Always ready for a challenge, a new dare? When things are not to your liking, you erupt like a volcano, splashing surroundings and people with lava and spurting rocks! Are you forcing by-standers to relocate rather than be splattered?
Never planning and having an unrealistic sense of what the future holds, are you always taken aback by events? Lacking the capacity of conscious, responsible action, you constantly blame the world for its intolerance. Rules and laws burden you!
To those of your entourage, the scene is becoming old! Now, you feel their despair or disdain!
Does this resemble your way of approaching life? Are you tired of feeling like the world does not understand your needs for total narcissistic behavior?
Yes, you are spectacular and reach goals few manage to envision! Your fans glorify you, the press loves you and you seem made of gold. Your image is everything! Only those close to you know at which expense you maintain this front. Sleepless nights and financial chaos loom.
You manage to convince yourself that what you say is really true, so much so that your sense of self is marred, confused, and apprehensive. Your image is so important that priorities are confused!
Some days, you’re depressed, weary, and aggressive.
You take advantage of people consciously or unconsciously. When they become aware of it, some will pity you for being so self-centered and destructive; some will just move away from your upheavals and your self-created maelstrom!
When will you take the time to face what you’ve become and see the ravages your body and mind have suffered? Isn’t it time to rethink your way of life and priorities?
Please take a step back and look at your life closely. There are alternatives that could fill your need to shine and be recognized.
Great challenges exist in domains where you can devote all that fury of yours, all that energy to a greater good. You’d still be free of choosing stimulating challenges and feel pride of the achievements. You’d still get attention and glory!
In these new pursuits you would be able to outdo yourself in the name of altruism. Your pride would fill that void that is now becoming a sufferance. Your selfless efforts at soothing others would make you feel worthwhile in another dimension, that of compassion. Perhaps, you would learn to pace yourself and take responsible, coherent action. You could learn to collaborate in teams and pursue open agendas in the best interest of all those concerned. Perhaps, the recognition you’d receive would also bring you the comfort of truly belonging, acting for the benefit of others with others. Maybe you would come to see the bigger picture and find what you seek, in the end.
Is this a too big step? Well then try to consider a minuscule change.
Little gestures go such a long way: A hug here, a kind word there. You may try giving the privilege of choice to another or offering to go along with someone else’s preference. These first steps would show your entourage that you do consider other things than your self-driven goals.
A second step would be to actually listen to your interlocutor when a response is given to one of your questions rather than plunging right into further explanations. Active listening is a difficult challenge in itself. When you curb your instinct to shut-out any comment or advice to further validate your righteousness, you may discover that the speaker will become intent on discussing with you further.
You’d soon be rewarded for your patience. When people feel listened to and actually taken into consideration, they are also more prone to support endeavors. Your interlocutor may even gratify you by acknowledging your creativity and sense of innovation, demonstrating genuine interest!
Deep down inside, isn’t that what you really want? It beats having people’s eyes glaze over, doesn’t it? Plus, fostering significant relationships becomes nurturing and soothing.
Once reflected upon, your craving for constant attention and novelty may reveal a profound need to accomplish something meaningful with your life. Be that as it may, remember that we all leave our mark. How would you like to be leave yours?
Happy Trails,
Elizabeth McNally, Mentor
LICENSED CERTIFIED EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE COACH
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