HOPE & RESILIENCE When the possible feels impossible

Hope, being the flickering light that gleams and brightens the dimmest paths, permitting to grasp at dreams, wholeheartedly, even when circumstances seem to alienate all positive outcome probabilities.

You’ve known, I’m sure, people who have made it beyond their dreams.  What makes them different?

Sure, you will see incredible perseverance, profound belief, skillful manifestations, outstanding courage but, the inner light of hope that propels through adversity is only ignited when resilience is present.  Resilience leads to triumph.

It glimmers through in the darkness of storms and still spikes you ahead when all wind has fallen from your sails, making you step up to the challenge even when all odds seem against you.

It pierces through gloomy thoughts, literally pushing you out of slumps, raising your stamina when you droop!  It kicks you into gear when you stammer, swooping you up when you’re down!

It may even be seen as a curse by some because it just won’t allow you to give up.  Like a little inner voice, it cheers you on even when you want to shut it down, stop and rest.   It just won’t let you give-up!

Those who are endowed with it may see it as a source of inexplicable possibilities that keep hammering alternatives to pursue their goal, energizing them, giving them the necessary drive to pursue their endeavor. 

Resilience is a strength that exponentially increases the probability of success.  In it lies Hope!

STUCK Are you in a rut?

You’ve done all you could to move ahead and now you’re stuck!  You can’t seem to identify what the next step is.  You’ve gone ahead, step by step and there it is, the WALL!  What’s next?  You hesitate; you flounder, questioning your decision-making:

<Should you have pursued this path?  Is it worth it?  Has the time/money investment not been too great? Will there ever be benefits to reap?>

You may even wake-up at night with anxiety attacks!  <What was the goal anyways?  Why do I feel like this?>

STOP.  It’s time to assess!

Now, describe the goal you started briefly.  You even have it written down in your agenda.  Then, describe it the way you see it now.   It is important because if it is a long-term life project like planning a change of career or retirement, it may not look exactly like it did at the beginning.

Changes occur with time.  You are constantly changing, evolving and so is everything around you.  When we are very focused, we become less aware of this.

Now, let’s clarify.

First, list all that is presently bothering you.  Write every little worry, doubt, fear, or hesitation that has taken place in the last 6 weeks.  State the level of stressed caused by these on a score of 10 being the highest.  Fold your paper, hiding your score.

Second, list all that has been accomplished until now.  Access the importance of these accomplishments.  List the challenges or problems encountered and resolved.  You may even want to state the time frame for these.

Third, list what is left to be accomplished, the means and resources available, time and place necessary.

Fourth, establish a plausible deadline according to what is left to accomplish.

Fifth, return to your list of worries, doubts, and fears.  Mark each one’s stress level of anxiety on 10 again.  Then, compare to see if your stress has dropped since the list was made.  Some may have dropped considerably; others may be non-existent once seen after having reviewed the accomplishments.

It’s time for a break.  Sleep on it and continue when rested.  When you’re ready, continue.

Sixth, take up your list again and analyze realistically each worry, doubt and fear with a fresh mind.  Rate your stress level once again.

Take a break, relax.  When you’re set to move ahead, take the plunge!  It’s important for you to replenish before moving on to the last phase.

Let’s cut to the chase.

How long will it now take to reap benefits?  Define benefits.

What are the last steps?  List them.

How long do you give yourself to get there?  Set your time frame.

Allow yourself to discard what has lost its importance, what is now unnecessary to you.

What can be outright eliminated or changed to enhance the end result, the success of your endeavor.

Decide on one easy step to get going again.  Celebrate every little accomplishment.

Focus and set realistic deadlines with options.  For instance, you may set to reassess every two weeks or two months.  You may give yourself alternatives in the event that you have not managed to reach your goal within a set time limit.

Monitor yourself closely and thoroughly by keeping a journal and read your accomplishments regularly.  

Now, you’re set to move on.  Remember, this process may need to be done a number of times throughout a project.  Just keep in mind that you can reach your goal and you will!

INJUSTICE Children being used as pawns

The insanity lying behind self-serving individuals using a child as a pawn, when proclaiming in all self-righteousness that much is owed for willingly choosing to have this child, bewilders me!

Insidiously demeaning the absent parent, attacking his/her credibility, the children are used as a financial bargaining chip.  Lies are slammed against the absent without remorse.  Blinded by rage, slander proliferates.

One has to wonder what these children will come to think under such appalling circumstances.  Hopefully, they will be spared in the dual of wits, the insults and manipulative actions taken.

In the name of protection, stability and security, the children may be isolated.  Beyond the bitterness, moments of joy and happiness may gleam brightly, shedding a warm glow on the days to come as the children grow.

In time, these children may see that there was more than what met the eye.  Beyond the blistering scalding, the points taken, individual parents struggled, often in secret, to spare those children the ill fortune life thundered upon them.

In time, these children may well come to realize that there are always two sides to each coin.  A story well told may gloss over the truth for a time.  Fortunately, the tides of life tend to uncover what lies beneath.

In time, the truth will be known.  Their mind will lead them to explore; their heart will help them listen and weigh the odds.  Never despair!  When the children are no longer children, they will see the truth on their own terms.  Hopefully, they will also be wiser with their own children.

Parents, always keep a line of communication open even if it’s hurtful and difficult.  That does not mean subjecting yourself to the badgering of the other parent.  Know when to back off and distance yourself.  There is no gain in endless fighting.   Ameliorate yourself as much as you can. That is possible and worthy of your effort.

You are a parent.  Despite the circumstances, this can never be taken from you.  Even if you cannot be actively involved now does not mean that you won’t be in the future.  Remember that you have many other roles which may benefit from your determination to improve and be all that you can be.   Be happy, be successful, and take pride in what you accomplish.  Some day, the opportunity to actively be a great parent will present itself. Then you will step-up and take that shared responsibility gleefully.

Have a nice week.  Happy Trails,

Elizabeth McNally

Mentor & Licensed Certified EI Coach, Certified Traumatologist

http://guidancequest.com/

info@guidancequest.com

For details on my books:

http://www.lulu.com/spotlight/infoatguidancequestdotcom

HEALTH Public Awareness is a global responsibility

It is unthinkable that someone exposes others to a debilitating disease simply because they feel it concerns no one that they are sick.   Fear of being discarded may lie beneath such attitude.   Even worse are those who refuse treatment and propagate illness without the least remorse.

Presently, people travel the world freely.  In some countries, some illnesses have been eradicated.  Unfortunately, when traveling, you may become exposed and contract one of these, never doubting that you have, until symptoms become evident.  Sometimes, you may be misdiagnosed because, in your country, this illness no longer exists or even worse, has never existed!

Educated awareness and cautiousness are essential to prevent outbreaks.  It is imperative that you be well-informed, take preventive measures and notify your medical advisor of the countries you have visited before your symptoms occurred. 

When convinced that there is no need and that you are just fine, you may resist any testing.  When diagnosed, you may resist treatment.  If against vaccination, you may shun upon being protected in this way, considering the possible effects a greater risk than the vaccine protection’s benefits. 

Now that many diseases are curable, hearsay may down-play the danger of contracting such illnesses.   It is often when many are ill that care posters, advertising the dangers to all those at risk, are promptly posted.   Do consult a specialized practitioner when in doubt!  Ask for a second opinion if necessary when symptoms persist.  When a diagnosis has been confirmed, do follow instructions carefully, treat yourself well and take the necessary measures to protect those around you.

Your immediate entourage trusts you.  Even is you are feeling guilty for contracting a disease, it is your responsibility to inform those around you so they can protect themselves adequately.  You will be respected for having the courage to let them know promptly so they can seek council as well.

A global social conscience needs to exist in everyone.  It is our world.  We need to inform, educate and protect our people.

Have a nice week.  Happy Trails,

Elizabeth McNally

Mentor & Licensed Certified EI Coach, Certified Traumatologist

http://guidancequest.com/

info@guidancequest.com

For details on my books:

http://www.lulu.com/spotlight/infoatguidancequestdotcom

Comment on my Blog:

http://guidancequestcom-eliprofesseure.blogspot.com/

HEALTH Public Awareness is a global responsibility

It is unthinkable that someone exposes others to a debilitating disease simply because they feel it concerns no one that they are sick.   Fear of being discarded may lie beneath such attitude.   Even worse are those who refuse treatment and propagate illness without the least remorse.

Presently, people travel the world freely.  In some countries, some illnesses have been eradicated.  Unfortunately, when traveling, you may become exposed and contract one of these, never doubting that you have, until symptoms become evident.  Sometimes, you may be misdiagnosed because, in your country, this illness no longer exists or even worse, has never existed!

Educated awareness and cautiousness are essential to prevent outbreaks.  It is imperative that you be well-informed, take preventive measures and notify your medical advisor of the countries you have visited before your symptoms occurred. 

When convinced that there is no need and that you are just fine, you may resist any testing.  When diagnosed, you may resist treatment.  If against vaccination, you may shun upon being protected in this way, considering the possible effects a greater risk than the vaccine protection’s benefits. 

Now that many diseases are curable, hearsay may down-play the danger of contracting such illnesses.   It is often when many are ill that care posters, advertising the dangers to all those at risk, are promptly posted.   Do consult a specialized practitioner when in doubt!  Ask for a second opinion if necessary when symptoms persist.  When a diagnosis has been confirmed, do follow instructions carefully, treat yourself well and take the necessary measures to protect those around you.

Your immediate entourage trusts you.  Even is you are feeling guilty for contracting a disease, it is your responsibility to inform those around you so they can protect themselves adequately.  You will be respected for having the courage to let them know promptly so they can seek council as well.

A global social conscience needs to exist in everyone.  It is our world.  We need to inform, educate and protect our people.

Self-Assessment Are you at the top of your game?

Your Emotional Intelligence skills are recognized.  Your Leadership, team work, perseverance, performance and resilience are well-known.   Your cognitive intelligence has been proven.  Your analytical skills and capacity to rationalize has proven useful in emotionally loaded circumstances.  You know yourself well and self-assess regularly to make sure you’re well and on track.  You’re self-confident and poised.  Your reliability is undeniable.  You strategize and prioritize well.  You know your limits well.  You know when to stop and change orientation.

When opportunities arise, you size up the advantages and disadvantages rapidly and are capable of making a definitive decision after careful yet rapid consideration.  Your frame of reference, updated regularly, has been enriched by readings, research and seminars.  You are well equipped to cope.  Professionally, you are at the top of your field.

You are well-rounded socially.  Your communication skills allow an easy interaction at all levels.  You know how to seek out the appropriate support.  When dealing with staff, you empathize easily and suggest alternatives for problem solving smoothly.  You are pleasant and firm. 

Your <joie de vivre> is felt by those who surround you.  Your encouraging smile goes a long way and you know it.  You are well-respected for who and what you are. 

There is equilibrium in your personal life as well.  You know how to balance all the facets of your life.   Your spirituality is based on strong values such as integrity, loyalty and compassion.  You monitor your health by being attentive to your body’s needs to eat well, sleep well and exercise.

Your companionship is fulfilling and respectful.  You feel loved and reciprocate in kind.  As a parent, you model well.  You know the importance of respecting differences.  You feel content with your life.  Financially, you are secure.  You may dwell in contentment with family and friends surrounding you.

Well then, what’s next?

Some seek to maintain their quality of life; others may turn to new challenges.  Still, others may realize that there is still work to do... 

Should there be some areas that you think need improvement, you may start an outline so that, during this year, you already have pointers as to what you plan to improve.  Month after month, you may reassess so as to reach you goals.  A lifetime of improvement can only benefit you.  Take one step at the time and move towards your next challenge!

Have a nice week.  Happy Trails,

Elizabeth McNally

Mentor & Licensed Certified EI Coach

http://guidancequest.com

info@guidancequest.com

For details on my books:

http://www.lulu.com/spotlight/infoatguidancequestdotcom

Comment on my Blog:

http://guidancequestcom-eliprofesseure.blogspot.com/

SUCCESS One of Its key elements

Making yourself a success can take unimaginable proportions.  The nitty-gritty of it lies in developing your inner skills to the utmost of your possibilities.  Everyone’s potential is immense.  Not many tap into its fountain of wealth.  Can it be measured?

From your point of reference, yes!  Each little success builds to a larger one.  Success, in itself, changes face as you change individuals.  For one, it can be a well remunerated job; for another, secure employment will top off financial benefits.  The Ace sought out will vary greatly.  However, one thing is certain.   Your capability of solving problems of any kind prepares you for Success.

When you look at your life, it is your decision and only yours that can label anything a success.  Minute positive outcomes can be huge successes.  Your capacity to take the reigns solidly in your hands in a decisive manner will determine the outcome. 

Confusion occurs when we mix others’ values and perspectives to measure our own accomplishments.  Others’ expectations may weigh heavily within the parameters of successfully accomplishing anything.  This can, in turn, become a crushing experience, rendering you bitter, empty and longing for approval.

There is only one guarantee of never being disappointed in your strive for success will have.  It is for yourself to set the bar with that label.  You are a builder.  Strengthening your mind, body, heart and soul will enable you to reach your goal.  Within a huge success, there may be thousands of tiny increments which really need to be celebrated as such along the way.

These exist within all elements, all tasks accomplished.

I’ve often been asked why I use the words < NIFTY outcome celebration> as the last phase of any goal sought.  Well, if you read this tiny word and go back to when you first heard it, probably as a child, you’ll feel the uplifting light joy linked to something special which had been labeled as <NIFTY>.

It’s simple yet so fulfilling; it makes you smile; it also reflects the unexpected almost spectacular connection linked to the accomplishment.  It’s so joyfully mobile that it could almost propel you to reach your next goal gleefully.

It’s particular, unique, standing alone in the ore of Success belonging only to you.  It is linked to a pleasurable little feeling of having conquered the world, your world.  And, it is with this tinkling feeling of self-accomplishment that you are energized for your next pursuit.

So will you take the time to feel your every success, to tap yourself on the shoulder and let yourself be transformed by this moment of achievement?

I sure hope so!  It is the key to contentment and self-satisfaction that brings you to want to experience more Success!  It is the beginning of your ever ending route to self-accomplishment!

Making yourself a success can take unimaginable proportions.  The nitty-gritty of it lies in developing your inner skills to the utmost of your possibilities.  Everyone’s potential is immense.  Not many tap into its fountain of wealth.  Can it be measured?

From your point of reference, yes!  Each little success builds to a larger one.  Success, in itself, changes face as you change individuals.  For one, it can be a well remunerated job; for another, secure employment will top off financial benefits.  The Ace sought out will vary greatly.  However, one thing is certain.   Your capability of solving problems of any kind prepares you for Success.

When you look at your life, it is your decision and only yours that can label anything a success.  Minute positive outcomes can be huge successes.  Your capacity to take the reigns solidly in your hands in a decisive manner will determine the outcome. 

Confusion occurs when we mix others’ values and perspectives to measure our own accomplishments.  Others’ expectations may weigh heavily within the parameters of successfully accomplishing anything.  This can, in turn, become a crushing experience, rendering you bitter, empty and longing for approval.

There is only one guarantee of never being disappointed in your strive for success will have.  It is for yourself to set the bar with that label.  You are a builder.  Strengthening your mind, body, heart and soul will enable you to reach your goal.  Within a huge success, there may be thousands of tiny increments which really need to be celebrated as such along the way.

These exist within all elements, all tasks accomplished.

I’ve often been asked why I use the words < NIFTY outcome celebration> as the last phase of any goal sought.  Well, if you read this tiny word and go back to when you first heard it, probably as a child, you’ll feel the uplifting light joy linked to something special which had been labeled as <NIFTY>.

It’s simple yet so fulfilling; it makes you smile; it also reflects the unexpected almost spectacular connection linked to the accomplishment.  It’s so joyfully mobile that it could almost propel you to reach your next goal gleefully.

It’s particular, unique, standing alone in the ore of Success belonging only to you.  It is linked to a pleasurable little feeling of having conquered the world, your world.  And, it is with this tinkling feeling of self-accomplishment that you are energized for your next pursuit.

So will you take the time to feel your every success, to tap yourself on the shoulder and let yourself be transformed by this moment of achievement?

I sure hope so!  It is the key to contentment and self-satisfaction that brings you to want to experience more Success!  It is the beginning of your ever ending route to self-accomplishment!

Have a nice week.  Happy Trails,

Elizabeth McNally

Mentor & Licensed Certified EI Coach

http://guidancequest.com

info@guidancequest.com

For details on my books:

http://www.lulu.com/spotlight/infoatguidancequestdotcom

Comment on my Blog:

http://guidancequestcom-eliprofesseure.blogspot.com/