lundi 7 février 2011

Grief Reclaiming your life after a loss


All kinds of losses can make you feel like it’s the end!  Some are worse than others.  Whether it is a separation, a divorce, a death, it will wind you out!  The grieving period will extend according to your needs and one day, you will feel the need to claim your life back.

Life’s opportunities sort of coax you into accepting that you are still alive and must live.  The quality of this life will depend on you and your capacity to take the initiative so try to follow your intuition on what’s right for you. At this present time, some people radically move into grasping every opportunity that comes their way, famished by a lengthy <non period>.  Others take minuscule steps.  All move on eventually.

Focusing on a quality oriented life does bring its rewards.  Each person will need to assess what he/she consider this to be.  It will vary from one individual to the next.

Planning a full recovery is as necessary as planning a huge project.  You will need to discover what is meaningful to you all over again. Then, once you’ve identified your immediate goals, you should consider a couple of longer term goals that will motivate you and bring you a healthy sense of being.

As soon as you wish to move into this phase, you will see opportunities arise.  Be selective so that you take the challenges that are suitable for you. 

A spouse losing his/her mate may wish to move on to another relationship.  There are many groups out there.  You may join them on the Internet to get the feel of it or you may check your communities’ services to see if widows or divorcees or singles’ groups are offered. 

Rediscovering relationships is a task in itself.  Take it easy.  If you seek only friendship, be clear about it.  Be authentic, genuine and honest, plus take the time to pace yourself through this discovery.  Analyze your feelings as you go.
When it’s moving too fast for you, take two steps back, reflect on the reasons for your hesitation and make a decision as to your next step.  Follow your gut feeling.  Your intuition will rarely let you down in these circumstances.

Depending on age, culture, gender and background, your post-grieving period will be lengthened or shortened.  And you hold the key.  Be kind to yourself and allow yourself to be happy all over again.  Life is worth living at its fullest!  Find your way and go for it!

Happy Trails!

Elizabeth McNally
Mentor & Licensed Certified EI Coach



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